How To Find Your Core Values For Better Decisions
I wanted to be as successful as Bill Gates.
Have a big international company.
Be a CEO.
It is being recognized as a successful Entrepreneur.
Instead of going that path …
I sabotaged myself.
Through that time, a big and loud voice was yelling:
“You want to become a CEO, and if you aren’t, you are a failure”.
It wanted to convince me that this is who I am.
This situation stressed me.
For over 20 years, I was unhappy.
Until I finally decided to step back.
To try another approach:
Listen more.
Listen closer.
I started to do simple things:
- Making small pauses during the day
- Taking walks with music
- Doing more workouts
- Playing the piano
- Went for hiking
- Meditating
And that’s what it needed.
The Discovery
Over time, my mind calmed down.
And at one day I realized:
There is another voice.
More subtle.
More like a whisper.
It doesn’t want to send me to war.
But instead, it felt like pure kindness.
This voice doesn’t talk to us.
It speaks to us in the form of bodily sensations.
This was the compass I wanted my whole life.
The whole time it was there.
Hidden behind all the yelling and emotions.
This is the ultimate compass and Decision Force.
I believe that everybody has a true inner nature.
And this inner nature connects to our conscious mind through intuition.
Let me explain this a bit more:
Our inner nature is our character, experiences, culture, Genes, and whatever influences us.
It’s subconscious and we can’t access it.
But it’s there and wants to help us.
How can you use it?
Do you know your true values?
In this part I have a little task for me.
It roughly takes 15 Minutes to do.
This is a crazy simple exercise.
And I hope you will be equally surprised by it.
In the past, I thought my biggest values were:
1) Freedom
2) Authonomy
3) Growth
Because big CEOs … they want growth… and autonomy.
But the simple exercise I am going to show you changed that.
After 20 years.
It’s easy:
Step 1: Take pen and paper
Yes, do it the old-school way.
Grab a pen and a paper.
Now brainstorm for 5 minutes values.
Don’t try to select or filter.
Just write them down.
One row, one value.
Step 2: Read and select 10
Now it’s time to filter, a bit.
Read over the values.
From first to last row.
Select 10 values.
Go by intuition.
Don’t think.
Take 60 seconds max.
Step 3: Listening to your compass
Now it’s time to go a step deeper.
Write the 10 values again underneath each other.
Like: Now we do a KO-Match.
Do this QUICK.
Now you compare each combination.
With the question in mind “What’s more important to me?”
And make a line behind the goal that wins.
Let me show you:
- You start with Goal 1 and Goal 2
- Does goal 1 feel more important?
- Make a stroke behind Goal 1
- Now compare Goal 1 with Goal 3…
- Until you reach Goal 10
- Now you start with Goal 2 and compare it with Goal 3
- Continue doing this until you finish
It shouldn’t take more than 10 minutes.
Now you have a list of values.
Underline the 3 with the most stories.
Et voilá:
Those are your most important values.
Sometimes “the voice” wants to interfere.
Tell you “that’s not YOU!”.
Don’t listen.
What sometimes happens:
By reading through the list, you have the feeling:
“This one feels better than the one with the most strokes”.
If it’s a kind feeling: Listen to it.
Now you have the list of your 3 most important values.
Mine are:
Does this sound like the CEO of a multinational corporation?
For me, neither.
What’s next?
Have your new values surprised you?
Is this “feeling” instead of thinking new to you?
This little exercise connects you directly with your inner nature.
By improving your listening skills, you will make better decisions.
I am obsessed with the creator economy and dissect it for you.
Originally published at https://www.dennistroeger.com on December 8, 2023.
